Sunday, April 14, 2013

It's Probably Worth Mentioning


I am not dead. I thought I’d mention that just in case you were wondering, I mean, if you are the type of person who wonders about that sort of thing. I’m that type of person. If I don’t hear from someone, I think, hmm, maybe they’re dead - especially if they’ve been blogging about medical problems. Yeah, makes perfect sense. I Google their name paired with the word “obit” and, if I know the city they live in, I Google that as well. Usually an hour later, after reading about all the dead people who share the same name but live oddly different lives at oddly different ages, I am able to move on with my day - just slightly more depressed. The upside of my dead people research is that most of the time the person that I thought was dead wasn’t dead at all. Like me. As I mentioned, I am not dead. Yay me.

Actually, I’ve been novel writing. I wrote over 136,000 words in three months. I know word count has no meaning to non-writers. I’ve been explaining to those who have inquired about my writing activities and then look at me blankly when I excitedly tell them my word count, that the first Harry Potter book has 76,944 words and Twilight has 118,502. And then they look at me and ask or imply one of two questions – so I’ll answer both of them now. No, the book I just wrote is not a book intended for kids or teens, but for grown-ups, and is nothing like those two books I just mentioned so I am not comparing my work to those books. And yes, I do read literary books, so stop giving me that snobby stare because the words “Harry Potter” and “Twilight” just came out of my mouth as a point of reference. I like kidlit and I’m proud. And who are you to judge? I just wrote 136,000 words. Ha.

Not that word count is any indication of quality writing. I’ve written a few lengthy manuscripts and have actually disliked my finished product. I didn’t even bother revising those projects. They were my practice novels. Or pre-novels. As far as my current project goes, I love my characters, I love the story, and I loved writing it. I’ll be starting my fourth revision soon. So, regardless of whether or not anyone else likes what I’ve written, it has been an exciting and worthwhile few months.

Because I’ve been fanatically writing 10-15 hours per day for months on end, I’ve given my family a slight taste of what it would be like if I were dead. I’ve regularly skipped out on cleaning dirty dishes. The crew has eaten an appallingly large amount of “quick and easy” dinners off of paper plates. These meals usually involve a can opener and microwave and can be complete in less than five minutes. Menu items include: bean & cheese burritos, chili nachos, anything cheese can be melted on.  There goes my future cookbook project; I just gave away all my good stuff. For free. Enjoy. I hope you like cheese.

Sorry, I've been punchy lately, possibly even annoying. I've been sleep deprived, my eyeballs are dried out and bloodshot, and I can barely carry a conversation without embarrassing myself. I'm pretty sure the carpool moms think I've been on a major drinking binge. My family has been strangely supportive. Or they're afraid of me. Perhaps it's a combination of both. Smart family.

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